Category: Sitcom Christmas

Sitcom: Dragnet

Episode: The Christmas Story

Year: 1967

Story line: The infant disappears from the church creche at Christmas.

Details: Someone has godnapped the Baby Jesus from a church manager display, and Sgt. Friday and Officer Gannon have to track down the villain. This is a cool episode, complete with an unrelated stop to investigate a domestic dispute. Despite Friday’s efforts to bring peace to the couple, they end up fighting anyway. Then the duo gets called to the San Fernando Mission, where someone has absconded with the baby Jesus from the manager. In a cool twist, Barry Williams (Greg Brady, to Brady Bunch fans) is the altar boy who fingers the suspect. But the suspect turns out to be a dead-end and it looks as if the Mission will have to celebrate Christmas without baby Jesus. As Friday and Gannon are explaining to Father Rojas that Jesus might not be back in time for Christmas, little Paquito pulls a red wagon down the Mission’s aisle, and in the back is baby Jesus. After an exchange in Spanish between Paquito and the priest, we learn the child prayed to Jesus for the wagon and promised him the first ride if he got it. So baby Jesus got to go for a spin around the block. And all is right with the world.

Killer quote: “Paquito’s family, they’re poor,” the priest tells Friday, explaining that the toy wagon the child received was a second-hand gift from firefighters and that’s why he got it the day before Christmas.

“Are they, Father?” Friday asks in his cop staccato. No answer needed. That little Paquito is rich in Christmas spirit.

Ebenezer alert: Capt. Mack, Friday and Gannon’s shift boss, who tries to send them on another case in Bakersfield instead of back to the Mission to find baby Jesus. Crafty Friday manages to get the hard-nosed captain to let them go find baby Jesus instead.

Childhood memory: I was a fool for these corny crime dramas, and Dragnet fit the bill. I remember my father joking about Friday’s stiff demeanor. We used to watch this as a family while we ate our evening “treats” of pop and ice cream, but I have no recollection of this episode.

Sitcom Christmas Index

Sitcom: Pee-wee’s Playhouse (I know, it’s not technically a sitcom; but my obsessive blogging, my rules.)

Episode: Pee-wee’s Playhouse Christmas Special

Year: 1988

Story line: Frankie Avalon and Annette Funicello join Pee-wee to celebrate Christmas.

Details: This hour-long special has it all, including awesome cameos from Grace Jones, Whoopi Goldberg, Magic Johnson, Joan Rivers, Cher, Little Richard, k.d. lang, Zsa Zsa Gabor, Dinah Shore and Santa. The secret word is “Year.” The animation is amazingly cool. And the Pee-wee induced antics are hilarious. This is what Christmas is all about.

Killer quote:

“You’re the best Santa there is,” Pee-wee tells Claus.

“I know you are, but what am I?,” Santa responds without missing a beat. Nice.

Killer quote II: “Meka Leka Hi Meka Hiney Ho. Meka Leka Hi Meka Ho Ho Ho.” Jambi the Genie, riffing on his usual chant to reflect the holidays.

Killer quote III: “This was supposed to go to the White House, not the Playhouse.” Reba the letter carrier, who notices the box containing Grace Jones was delivered to the wrong address. Grace jumps out anyway and sings a bizarre version of the Little Drummer Boy for Pee-wee and friends.

Ebenezer alert: Randy the red-headed bully, of course. He spends much of the special dissing Christmas. But a special Ebenezer shout-out also goes to Pee-wee, who forces poor Frankie Avalon and Annette Funicello to create and mail hundreds of Christmas cards, turning the Playhouse into a Christmas sweatshop. He also plays a cruel trick on poor Dinah Shore as she sings the 12 Days of Christmas via videophone.

Childhood memory: Well, this is more of a 20-something memory, but I vividly recall rushing to get the Albuquerque Tribune typeset so my friend Juliette Torrez and I could sneak into the conference room on Saturday mornings to watch Pee-wee’s Playhouse between editions. No specific recollection of this special, but if I missed it the first time around, I’m glad Tivo gave me this second chance. I still laugh out loud every time I watch Pee-wee.

Sitcom Christmas Index

Sitcom: Adam-12

Episode: Christmas

Year: 1974

Story line: The Christmas spirit is sorely lacking on the partners’ tour of duty.

Details: Officers Reed and Malloy spend Christmas Eve fighting crime and distributing presents to needy kids. They meet little Harvey’s mother in a parking lot to give her a yellow dump truck they bought him, along with other toys, but when she goes to buy a tree someone steals the car and all the presents in it. But Reed and Malloy are on the case, and they eventually track down the car thief and manage to outsmart department bureaucracy to ensure that little Harvey gets his dump truck.

Killer quote: “You gotta be a real creep to steal toys from kids, especially on Christmas.” The car thief, explaining that he stole the car and TV in it but had no idea the trunk was packed with presents for kids. I guess he wouldn’t have taken it if he had known that. Har.

Ebenezer alert: The car thief, though as the quote above indicates he’s not all bad. Malloy also has a bit of Scrooge in him, initially refusing to buy a yellow dump trunk for Harvey. But he’s a cop with a heart of gold and borrows three bucks from Reed to buy the truck for Harvey.

Childhood memory: This was one of my favorites as a kid. I think it aired Saturday nights, so we used to watch it after returning from Mass (Catholics get to cheat on Sunday like that …). I don’t remember this episode specifically, though. But the crackly “One Adam-12 One Adam-12 … see the lady at …” still bounces around in my brain from time to time.

Sitcom Christmas Index